Police in Kingston, Ontario, were called to the scene by a man who claimed two thugs assaulted him on his way to work and tried to steal his wallet.

The man had a swollen lip and a possible broken nose, the Whig Standard reports.

After questioning him, the police began noticing holes in his story. Eventually, he broke down and told the truth: He’d punched himself in the face several times and concocted the mugging story to use as an excuse to skip work.

Police didn’t release the name of the man’s employer, but the officer who questioned him said, “I can only assume that they didn’t have a great sick plan where he works.”

In the end, the cops were kind enough to give the “victim” what he wanted. He got the day off — but he had to spend the day in jail for filing a false police report.

What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever seen an employee do for a day off? Let us know in the comments section below.

Due to a payroll processing error, a bus monitor in Nashville, TN, quit her job yet still received a paycheck for an additional eight weeks.

When asked how it could happen, a spokeswoman for the school district simply said, “It didn’t get communicated to the person in payroll.”

Eventually, someone noticed the error, MSNBC reports. No word on how much money was paid, or if the district will try to recover it.

The worst part: School officials say the district may need to cut up to $15 million from next year’s budget. So, like at most employers these days, every penny counts.

This news comes less than a week after it was a reported a bus driver in the district was caught stealing more than $9,000 worth of gas for her personal car.

New hires at SuccessFactors, a software firm based in San Mateo, CA, are required to sign off on a list of 15 corporate principles.

Number 15: “I will not be an a–hole.”

CEO Lars Dalgaard implemented that policy after years of corporate experience taught him that jerks (as we’ll call them) “stifle performance,” he told the San Francisco Chronicle.

As for the harsh language, he said the rule would be easier to ignore without it.

What also makes the rule tough to ignore is that Dalgaard isn’t afraid to enforce it. One time, he took a group of job candidates out to lunch at a local restaurant. Those who weren’t friendly to the waitstaff weren’t brought back to continue the interview process.

Ever worked at a company that needed a policy on jerks? Do you think a rule like Dalgaard’s is good for a company or just an impractical gimmick? Let us know your opinion in the comments section.

First it was the caretaker job for a tropical Australian island.

Now, AirAsia is asking for entries from people who want to be a pilot — no experience required.

The Malaysian airline’s Web site makes it seem easy: “So YOU wanna be a pilot? Simple. What do you have to do? Blog. What? That’s it? Yes, you’re reading it right. Blog.”

The airline will select 10 finalists who will take part in the first round of new pilot intake.

The contest starts April 1. Hm. Has anyone noticed that’s April Fools’ Day?

Five months ago, Jason Fruen of Manchester, England, lost his job as a mechanical maintenance engineer.

After sending his resume to companies and having no luck, he adopted a different strategy: He started wearing the resume.

Fruen donned a sandwich board that read, in big bold letters, “Mechanical maintenance engineer, seeking employment,” along with his telephone number, the Daily Mail reports.

His plan: Stand by an industrial complex and hope someone pays attention. He didn’t have to wait very long.

On his first day of self-advertising, a car pulled over. The owner of a local company offered him a job.

Unfortunately, it was only for a two-and-a-half month temporary assignment. So now, Freun is hitting the streets again, starting every day at 5:30 a.m.

What extreme job-seeker tactics have you seen or heard about? Would anything like Freun’s gimmick grab your attention enough to consider someone for a job? Let us know in the comments section below.

Henry Velez suffered from a rare medical condition that made him unable to sweat. Despite that problem, he worked in manual labor for most of his life. He had one work restriction: He needed to take breaks to cool down.

While working for Agro Distribution, he spent about two years without any problems — his manager allowed him to take breaks as needed.

Then every employee in Velez’s position was assigned a new duty — the unpleasant task of unloading dirty, empty barrels that had been used to feed cattle. Velez told his boss his condition prevented him from helping.

The manager wouldn’t hear of it — after all, he’d been performing similar work for two years. What was different now?

Velez filed a complaint with the EEOC, alleging the company violated the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA). The agency thought he had a case.

However, the EEOC handled the matter in a way that was less than objective, according to the company. When an investigator came to the facility, she insulted managers, scoffed at their answers to questions and attempted to rephrase their statements to favor Velez.

Afterward, the company claimed it tried to contact the EEOC to offer a settlement, but the agency never responded.

Eventually, the issue ended up in court. The judge agreed with the company that Velez wasn’t protected by the ADA. And, the court ruled, the EEOC “failed to conciliate in good faith.”

The final decision: The case was tossed, and the EEOC was forced to pay Agro’s legal fees.

Cite: EEOC v. Agro Distribution LLC.

The man who inspired the character Sam Malone on TV’s Cheers has been laid off from his bar tending job in Boston.

Eddie Doyle tended bar for 35 years at the pub known as the Bull & Finch.

The bar’s owner says the economy is to blame.

After Cheers debuted on NBC in 1982, he started serving 5,000 customers a day.

Doyle tells The Boston Globe that he’s not bitter and he might write a book about his experiences.

While working at the North Carolina Department of Transportation, Elsie Hinton was warned by her boss four times about napping during work hours.

The fifth time she was caught, she got fired.

Now she’s filing a complaint demanding the DOT reinstate her, the Charlotte Observer reports.

Hinton says she suffers from sleep apnea, which prevents her from getting continual rest at night. She uses medical equipment to help her sleep, but claims it had been malfunctioning.

The DOT maintains it shouldn’t have to use taxpayer money to pay an employee to sleep.

Does Hinton have a case?

Maybe. Some courts have agreed that sleep apnea is a disability as defined by the Americans with Disabilities Act, and that allowing periodic rest breaks could be a reasonable accommodation for employees in some positions.

What do you think about the outcome of this case? Let us know in the comments section below.

In their new book, Everyday Practices of Extraordinary Consultants, Christine Lambden and Casey Connor have compiled a list of “The 13 Most Annoying People to Work With.”

1. Pontification Person – These people go on and on, telling you what they’re going to say, saying it and then telling you what they said.
2. Um Person – To avoid losing control of the conversation, this co-worker fills every pause with “Um,” not realizing that she might be able to think better if she weren’t talking.
3. Too Much Detail Person – ‘Nuff said.
4. 50,000 Foot Only Person – He is eloquent when you talk about the big picture, but refuses to allow anyone to get into the details, which we all know is where the real work gets done. Unless someone is the CEO of a multi-national corporation, the employee has to be willing to work at any altitude.
5. Hypnotized by E-mail Person – If you go to the trouble to think of a meeting topic, send out an invitation, invent an agenda and prepare slides, you naturally expect people who show up for your meeting to pay attention while you talk. Wireless technology has made it possible for people to multi-task very effectively, but there is nothing more defeating than presenting to the tops of the people’s heads because everyone at the conference table is hunched over his or her laptop.
6. Buzzword Person – This employee is annoying in meetings, team rooms and in cubicles. In fact, this person is just plain annoying all the time.
7. Foul Language Person – Much like Buzzword Person, this co-worker is obviously too lazy to think of the right words to express what he is thinking, if indeed he is thinking at all. But this person isn’t trying to impress you with his knowledge. He isn’t trying to impress you at all. He doesn’t care what you think of him.
8. Reiteration Person – If the only contribution an employee has to make at work is to restate what has already been said, she doesn’t have any contribution to make.
9. Too Busy To Be Prompt Person – If an employee is always late to work or every meeting, there is something wrong with the way he manages his schedule or time. He should fix this behavior. It’s rude.
10. Can’t Control the Meeting Person and her arch-nemesis Wants To Take Over the Meeting Person.
11. Secondary Conversation People – These folks are more annoying if their conversation is less interesting than the meeting.
12. Disagrees With Everything Person – This co-worker honestly believes he is just being practical, or serving as the Voice Of Reason, or playing Devil’s Advocate. This may be true sometimes, and even helpful occasionally, but when it becomes a habit, everyone else just tunes him out.
13. Obscure Metaphor Person – This employee is as annoying as the fool in a troupe of Morris dancers. (See? Wasn’t that annoying?)

For more about this book, click here.

Do you have a story about an employee who would fit a description on this list? Do you have a type of annoying person to add to the list? Let us know in the Comments Box below.

Eileen Karre was the manager of the university’s Babcock Dairy Store for 20 years. She was fired last July for violating food safety and quality rules.

Documents say she allegedly sold expired ice cream and failed to enforce store cleanliness, according to The Badger Herald.

Karre says many of the stated reasons for her firing were the faults of other employees or the ice cream production plant.

University documents also allege Karre made two Asian student employees wear name tags because they looked similar and she couldn’t tell them apart.

Karre said, “They look alike, and I’m bad with names anyway. It had nothing to do with their nationality. I just couldn’t tell them apart.”

She also claims she made all employees wear name tags.

Karre says she tasted all the supposedly outdated ice creams personally to tell if they were expired. She says she did have workers throw out some expired sherbets, but that the ice creams were good.

The university has declined comment on Karre’s claims because of the pending investigation.